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New language = new personality?

Updated: Aug 26

''Do you change personality according to the language you speak, Caroline?''


You'd be surprised how often students ask me this question or how often people new to languages declare, without the shadow of a doubt, ''When I learn a new language, I will become a different person''.


So where does the idea come from?


Because learning a language often feels scary and exposing, it helps to imagine that you become another person as you are using it, especially if you're at a point in your life where you badly need a change.


However the focus has to be on the other speaker, in order to understand what they're saying and to reply accordingly. The more aware you are of your own self talking, the less attention you're paying to communicating efficiently.


The process of learning a language opens you up to a new culture, to new habits and new ways of thinking, some of which you might end up adopting, but that is not the point.


At the risk of sounding like a broken record, the whole point here is communication, not self-perception.


As for having a new personality, not only is not possible to get one using sheer willpower (though many have tried and will keep on trying), but it's probably a good thing that it isn't! What is possible though, through hard work and awareness, is to gradually change some of our traits, ideas, and perceptions and, in the process, to evolve.


Asking me if I am a different person when I speak Italian feels decidedly like a linguistic parody of Doctor Jekyll and Mr Hyde! My job isn't to turn into an Italian person when I speak the language, because frankly I can't and don't want to, but to lean into some of my personality traits to emphasise ideas and emotions, in order to communicate better.


It is subtle shift, because the last thing an Italian speaker needs, is a Scandinavian looking woman doing a parody of an Italian mamma! It would not only be offensive but utterly ridiculous.


In other words, I'm more expressive and demonstrative when speaking Italian, and way more so when speaking French, which is my mother tongue, because these are two latin languages, which rely heavily on emoting.


And I'd like to think that I can be funny, using British humour, when speaking or writing in English. After all, I've been using the language for the past 40 years and living in the UK for the past 23. Something's got to have rubbed off on me! Why not humour?


Finally, speaking in a different language can sometimes give you a sense of freedom, of being able to say certains things you wouldn't otherwise say, which can feel liberating. But at the end of the day, you are still the same person.



Don't hesitate to send me your questions.




 
 
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